Here's your chance to emulate the late, great Edgar Allan Poe--well, sort of. Post your two stanza parodies of Poe's famous poem, The Raven. Be creative! Remember to copy Poe's rhythm and rhyme scheme, but the topic's all yours!
These need to be posted by Wednesday!
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I have a question on this assignment. Is there a minimum amount of words in the original poem that we don't have to change?
Once upon a night so eerie, I starred out of my window clearly,
Over many a quaint and curious ballad of country music I adore,
While I drove on, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As if something gently rapping, rapping under my car floor.
“Tis some obstruction,” I stuttered, “lodged under my car floor-
Only this, and nothing more.”
Ah, distinctly I recall before it took that dreaded fall,
The tires let out a horrid call for they had control no more.
Rapidly I neared the ridge jumping out before the bridge
From my eyes a look of sorrow- sorrow sinking near the shore-
For the stunning and splendid car and to the heavens I deplore-
Now rests upon the river floor.
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I typed, weak and weary
Over many tedious and tiresome volumes of a repetitive chore-
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As if someone gently rapping, rapping at my study door,
“Tis some delivery man,” I muttered, “tapping at my study door,
Only this and nothing more.”
Ah distinctly I remember it was on a bleak December;
And each stroke of the clock brought a wanting to snore.
Eagerly I wished the marrow- vainly I had sought to scurry
Just a few hours more to hurry- hurry through the last chore-
Through the rancid and ridiculous task of this forsaken chore-
Finally done and nevermore.
Once upon a evening dreary, while I labored weak and weary
Over the many pages of homework left untouched
While I pondered, nearly sleeping, suddenly there came a creeping
As of someone gently stepping, stepping, to my bedroom door
“Hello! Is no one there”, I shouted, “creeping to my bedroom door
Only silence and nothing more
Ah, certainly I remembered it was in the black of night
And each separate muted step becoming clearer on the floor
Silently I wished it was no more, -- for I was frightened to my core
From the depths of my body came a scream of horror--horror for the footsteps at my door
There upon the bleak of night stood the silent sight of the footsteps at my door
Only this and nothing more
Once upon a mid-day dreary, while i hungered weak and weary,
Felt it deep within my tummy, something sore-
While it rumbled, i nearly passing, suddenly there came a thumping, As if something harshly snapping, snapping on my tummy floor-
"Tis some ache," i muttered, "snapping on my tummy floor- only this and nothing more."
Ah distinctly i reply, twas the warmest of July;
And each deep and hollow grumble, rumbled from my tummy floor.
Loudly i began to scream- for all i needed was ice cream! From the freezer to my mouth- straight down to my tummy floor-
For the rich and creamy goodness settling on the floor-
Pleasing greatly my tummy floor.
Once upon a night of starlight, i found myself in a strange and odd plight,
It started with nothing, just me the night and a decent sized snore,
Soon found myself, mutterting muses when i heard above me a flock of gooses,*
With a soft trumpet and a sqwuak
to be polite, they floated onward until completely out of sight,
"What a dream," I sighed,"i should stop sleeping on the floor."
Only, upon what i lay, was not my floor.
Aparantly, it was mid december,
for it was in snow that i lay, definitely not my carpet,
If only a compass could be found to borrow;-maybe i could be home before the morrow,
Unfortunately no surcrease for my sorrow-sorrow for the lost well...me,
In a forest of darkness and dread-i fear i shall remain now, and forevermore.
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I wondered, weak and teary,
Over many a faint and furious volume of forgotten bore-
While I jotted, nearly napping; suddenly there came a tapping,
As of someone gently rapping, rapping on my bedroom door-
"'Tis some visitor," I shuddered, "tapping at my bedroom door-
Only this and nothing more."
Ah, logistically I remembered it was in the meek November;
And each desperate trying spender brought its boast upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; - mainly I had fought tomorrow
From my books came a decrease of sorrow- sorrow for the lost bedroom door-
For the barren haven that lay behind my bedroom door.
Famous here for nevermore.
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I read, cold and teary,
Over many strange and frightful ventures of forgotten lore-
While I wondered, nearly napping, suddenly there was a rapping,
From someone loudly tapping, tapping at my bedroom door-
"'Tis my mother," I muttered, "tapping at my bedroom door-
Tis a tale and nothing more."
Ah, distinctly I recall, I thought I heard something fall,
And every hushed step I took across the floor
Filled me with an insufferable doom;-as if taking my to my tomb.
I smelled a sweet perfume as i reached my dreadful door-
As if from pages of my wicked book, I started floating off the floor-
And here I woke upon a snore.
Once upon an 8 year dreary, there was a president that was weak and queery,
over many came a regime of idiots galore,
while i nodded, nearly snapping, suddenly there was a CIA kidnapping,
As of someone fiercly slapping, slapping at my face as if it was a chore,
"Tis some criminal," i muttered, "slapping at my face as if it is a chore-
only this and nothing more
Ah, distinctly i remember it was in the bleak of december;
and each seperate corrupt member slammed my head upon the floor.
Eagerly i wished for a carro,; so i could escape by tomorrow,
from my head splattered out blood of sorrow- sorrow for the country that has tore-
for the country and its once radiant success that the idiots have locked inside a trap door,
Bush is a brainless queer for evermore.
Once upon a school night dreary, while i thought long and hard,
Over one mind boggling and confusing assigment which I greatly deplore,
While I typed it, nearly napping, suddenly I heard a creaking,
As if something gently creeping, creeping upon the upstairs floor,
"'Tis my father," I concluded, "creeping on his bedroom floor,
Only this and nothing more"
Ah, distinctly I remember this happening just last night,
I was up again doing my work, it seemed to be my plight.
Eagerly I approached the ending of this one last weary task,
All I wanted was my pillow, to rest my eyes and to say good night at last,
For this silly assignment is now complete-
I may rest forevermore.
I woke from a dream so eerie, to a morning light and cheery,
The sun shining far to brightly to ignore-
While I got up, sore legs stinging, suddenly I hear a ringing,
As of someone loudly singing, singing from down on my floor-
“Must be a bored friend,” I muttered, “ringing my phone on the floor-
Only this and nothing more.”
Then distinctly I remember, that it was now mid-September;
Time for telemarketers’ calls to soar.
Eagerly to one hope I cling-vainly hope my phone would not ring
But my cells continues to ring-ring even louder than before-
This call is the one most hated, as my phone rings more and more-
Hated here for evermore.
One fine day I was walking to the boy I was stalking
I looked down to see that I had not put on a pair of pants
A little child stopped and pointed, by the way, I am double jointed
But his mother covered his eyes and said, "Don't be so volger Lance."
I should have known to put on a pair of pants!
Very next morning I went running and thought myself extremely cunning
For I remembered very clearly putting on a pair of pants
But, alas, my thoughts decieved me and perhaps you wont believe me
Again I found I'd been receiving many a shocked and curious glance
I didn't have on any pants!
I'm so tired, my eyes bleary, English class boring and dreary,
Supposed to be reading some poem, blocking it out to prevent its bore,
Sleep evading nearly failing, shutting out my teacher's railing,
Begging and pleading in my head, oh please keep me awake no more,
Blissfully, I began to snore
While sleeping, mostly dreaming of a place with life thats teeming,
No longer in the classroom snoring, boredom my energy leeching,
Down a path so perfect seeming, Walking, I enjoyed my dreaming,
While my teacher kept on teaching, ranting, railing, panting, preaching,
Unhappily, she heard me snoring.
By the way, these are all very good =)
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered weak and weary,
Over many an English paper I had yet to write,
While I lay there, wide awake there, suddenly there came a snuffling,
As of something gently shuffling, shuffling past my bedroom door.
"'Tis some basilisk," I muttered, "snuffling at my bedroom door,
Only this and nothing more."
Ah, distinctly I could hear it, as if some demented spirit,
trying to gain stealthy access, waited there beyond my door.
My mind was on my English project, and thus I had no time to object
to the furry little object scratching 'til its paws were sore.
My fuzzy little puppy, Penny, scratching 'til her paws were sore,
Begging to come through the door.
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